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Are you able to lie, even though you have Aspergers?

Last Updated: 17.06.2025 03:34

Are you able to lie, even though you have Aspergers?

Yes.

Nuda Veritas by Gustav Klimt. Public domain.

And like all humans, including the vast majority of autists, I do a lot of lying.

I caught my husband of 20 years looking at inappropriate pics of women on TikTok or Instagram. I'm not sure., but when I told him he got mad and made excuses of why they popped up. I then told him how I've snuck on his phone and saw what he's been looking at . We had a horrible big fight. I asked him why did he even marry me when I see the type he likes . Nothing like me, I'm petite, blonde and blue eyes. These women are dark haired dark eyed and have curvy bodies, large breasts, etc. I just don't feel the same about him after this. I can't get over this

When I lie, I’m not very convincing. No one ever looked at my masking and thought, “Now, that’s a normal person! Why, I’d like to have a drink with that woman. She seems just like me.” Similarly, when I speak untruths, I doubt most believe me.

Less than I used to, sure. When I considered it an inviolable obligation to mask, I lied constantly. I didn’t often lie with my words, but I implied facts that were untrue with every breath and movement. I was too terrified of the abuse that might result if I didn’t. Telling the truth was too dangerous.

Cognitive dissonance is incredibly uncomfortable for me. If I don’t feel like I’m doing the right thing, it shows. The only times I can lie convincingly, verbally or physically, is when it feels morally and ethically correct to lie. While performing in a play, for example. Or while comforting people with dementia.

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Because these settings don’t produce dissonance, I can lie fairly convincingly in these settings. It’s my conscience and my commitment to my own ideals that holds me back.